We have stepped into this time of grief with open hands. I know that it can look different with every person, especially every child. Ryder and Eden have seemed to be processing similarly, wanting to be close. They have wanted to sleep in our room, to be near us.
They have wanted to ask lots of questions about Jack and his last moments, wanting to know that he wasn't alone and that he wasn't scared or hurting. They have wanted to look through pictures of our recent trip to Shaver Lake in August and watch the dance party movies that we took. We have gone from listening to favorite worship songs, to songs that the boys loved while we were in the mountains like "The Avocado Song" and "Old Town Road". We have been present, with no question being off limits. Every emotion is acceptable. Teachers have been in the loop. Conversations with heavy tears have occurred. The beauty of this time is that we KNOW where Jack is. We KNOW that he is whole and no longer suffering. We KNOW that we will see him again. We KNOW that he is with our Jesus who is the one that knew the number of Jack's days, the loving Creator and His severe mercy who called him home. As we move forward, we know we never move on. Jack was part of our family and we are forever changed by his life. What an honor it was to love that kid and have him love our kids so well.❤︎
